It's Friday. Sex?
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize