Barsexuality is the new black.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
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