I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Randomize
