I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
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