Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(857): View more from Massachusetts

Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!

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(940): View more from Texas

That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone

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(847): View more from Illinois

dude, osama threatened the US again

(1-847): View more from Illinois

dude. i slept with your sister last night

(847): View more from Illinois

what?

(1-847): View more from Illinois

I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news

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(336): View more from North Carolina

If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.

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(727): View more from Florida

I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.

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(847): View more from Illinois

Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.

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(630): View more from Illinois

scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back

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(252): View more from North Carolina

I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises

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(870): View more from Arkansas

Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.

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