Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
so much tequila, so little girl.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Randomize
