i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize