My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
