Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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