No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Randomize
