If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
and you said cock pushups were impossible
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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