Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
