We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
Randomize
