so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Randomize
