The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
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