I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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