I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
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