I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
