eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize