soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
