I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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