Im at strip club and am horny
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
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