everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
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