I just saw a hot homeless man
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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