Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
