U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Randomize
