you would pick up someone in the library
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize