He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I cut my penus on the lid.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
