Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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