Her vagina should come with caution tape.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
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