omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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