the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
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