i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Farmville is her only friend.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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