I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Randomize
