Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
she smelled like a LAN party
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
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