I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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