dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
