Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize