I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
