Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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