His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
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