the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Randomize
