If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
May the power of my ass compel you!!
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
