I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Randomize
