I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
