just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Randomize