Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
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