pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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