girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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