I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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