Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
